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Sorry, I Don’t Have a Willy


In “A Deadly State of Mind,” George Hamilton plays Dr. Mark Collier, a deeply, deeply creepy psychologist. Complications with his patient/lover, played by Lesley “No ‘Ann’ For Some Reason” Warren threaten his career and murder ensues, but Columbo is on the case. RJ, Jon and guests Brenna Zedan and Anne Moloney (of the LadyLike Book Club) dig deep into this tale of barbituates, swimming, hypnosis, unethical medical practices and beige leather. As Anne says, it’s not a good episode for ladies and dogs.


  1. Carlos Carlos

    the Morris brother was in a ton of Columbo’s, including the Shatner one you just reviewed. He was the guy that messed up his line at the very beginning of the episode.

    He actually played a murderer in another episode I really hope you review at some point, a murderer who sings in two separate scenes.

    • Glenn Glenn

      Fred Draper was in 6 episodes. Just one of many actors who had recurring parts in Columbo.

  2. Loved the episode guys, and you a right this is a very creepy one.

    As A side note I also fall into the Columbo / Zardoz Venn diagram. I also welcome our future post apocalyptic Columbo themed world.

  3. This was delightful! Please have Brenna Zedan and Anne Moloney in every episode! And please fire RJ and Jon.

  4. Hey I just found Columbo. It’s a great show! And this podcast rules!

  5. Thanks folks, I’m glad you like it! And I’m sorry I swear so much! Also, Manning, I know where you live.

  6. Count me in for the Columbo/Zardoz ticket. When Jon first said “Zed” I wondered if it was going to be a Pulp Fiction connection. By the time he got to the end of the sentence, the only thing that kept me from punching the air was that I needed to maintain control of my bicycle.

  7. Mark D Mark D

    Clooney as Banacek is perfect but Forest Whitaker as Columbo? WTF?!

    Enjoying the podcast fellas. Are you guys just pulling eps out of a hat and what’s next? I want to send an email with some comments.

    • Editor Editor


      Right now, we’re going a bit on which ones the guests choose/which ones we think fit well for the guests.

      You can email us at columbo[at]!

      • Glenn Glenn

        Yeah I was wondering about the randomness of the episodes and why you didn’t choose to do them in chronological order. Now I know

    • Actually, I think Forest Whitaker is a surprisingly good idea. My all time fav idea is Christian Slater. If you’ve ever seen him in Prince of Thieves, there are a couple of parts where even his mannerisms are Columbo-ish.

  8. Carlos Carlos

    Why was Dr. Borden sitting by herself at the party? My theory is her fellow doctors were shunning her because they heard about her lack of diligence.

  9. Eek, somehow I did watch it again, but only because we ran out of netflix episodes. Gonna have to move on to the box sets we borrowed and never returned to a friend.

  10. Glenn Glenn

    One of my mid tier episodes. I quite like it but it’s not one of the best. The “party” scene is very strange. One of the many episodes where phones play a big part in the set up and execution of the murder and one of those episodes where there are more than one murder.

    As a Columbo fan how could you not want to see it again? the only episode I can’t watch is “Undercover”. There are a few episodes where they strayed from the usual formula of the show but “Undercover” goes way off track. That one and “No Time To Die”.

  11. This episode is special for me because it sparked the moment I fell in love with Columbo. I watched it as a kid, but didn’t really pay much attention to it. It was adult TV which I wasn’t interested in. I preferred The Six Million Dollar Man.

    Anyway, so my children were young and I was off work one day (I’m a nurse, so was often off work during the week, for working the weekends). It used to run on A&E in the early to mid-90s. A&E was a good station back then and had a lot of historical documentaries in the morning and so forth. Then on came Columbo.

    So I was changing the channel to A&E to see what was on. It was just as Lesley Ann Warren picks up the phone. I wondered what was wrong with her (I had always liked her and thought she was hilarious in Clue). Then I watched as she took a dive off her balcony and I had to watch to find out why!

    It was like being introduced to a drug. I couldn’t get enough. I began recording all of them and watching them as often as I could, sometimes rewinding (yep, ye olde VHS) and watching the same one several times in a row!

    Have you ever watched Cold Justice? Kelly Siegler is a prosecutor (a real one) and she says in just about every episode. “I love circumstantial cases!” Remember that many cases are built on circumstantial evidence. In the 70s we didn’t have DNA, AFIS, Closed Circuit cameras (in banks, but not everywhere) and all the resources that we have now. Circumstantial evidence was pretty powerful at the time.

  12. We are so used to seeing female forensic scientists (Dana Scully, Molly Hooper, Bones Brennan) that it seems like to update Quincy, you’d almost have to have a woman. I LOLed at the comment that we are out of Klugmans and we didn’t plan ahead. So sad but true.

    Idris Elba on TV in anything would be amazing!

    I feel like part of why Columbo broke the mold and stayed out all night/lost his temper was down to the fact that he knew the murder victim, and if she HAD committed suicide, he might feel some guilt over her death. It’s important to him personally that he proves it was a murder.

  13. Millie Millie

    Hmmm, George Hamilton playing somebody creepy…must have been quite a stretch for him.

    • RJ RJ

      Oh, if we ever are allowed by the Podcast Gods to record one that’s been twice-delayed, there’s more where that came from.

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