ordinances

Friday Facts: Narnia, Math, Linguistics, Lascivious Radios

By The City Desk
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:: Median age of mathematics texts used in city public schools:  18 years
:: Median tenure of mathematics teachers in city schools:  4.5 years
:: Median SAT mathematics score, city schools (2008):  485
:: Percentage of 12th graders in city schools who know how ‘median’ differs from ‘average’:  38%
:: A city ordinance passed in 1931 prohibited the hiring… »

Friday Facts: Charlie’s Angels Lunchboxes, Roadside Cabbage, Fake Squid

By The City Desk
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:: A City Council ordinance passed on this date in 1975 expressly prohibited the “display of images of a licentious, erotic, salient or pornographic nature, or which otherwise arouse the prurient interest for the sole purpose of titillation” on children’s metal lunchboxes.
:: The Seventh of the Eight Great Zoo Hoaxes was committed on this day… »

New Mayor to Toss Quarters

By The City Desk

One of outgoing Mayor Joseph Wilders’ best-received programs was his initiative to remove outdated ordinances from the city’s legal code (first item). However, the gratitude of the populace at no longer being required to maintain the lower edge of their moustaches above the upper lip (1871) eventually proved to have a negligible effect on his… »

What You’re Voting For Tomorrow, Locally

By The City Desk

That’s right, tomorrow’s election day and, in addition to the presidential race, there are also many local races and issues to be decided, in what is expected to be a day of record turnout. A few items which will appear on (most of) your local ballots follow:
Mayoral
Largely between incumbent Mayor Joseph Wilders (D) and longtime… »

The City’s Runaway Neighborhood Threatens Again

By The City Desk

President George W. Bush’s scheduled departure from office next year has many of our citizens preparing for a street fight of sorts. On February 1st, the upscale President Heights neighborhood is scheduled to add a second Bush St. to its ever-growing borders, and seven city organizations, including the Falmouth Hill Preservation Association, the Norbeck St…. »

The Bars of St. Mary’s

By The City Desk
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Liquor permits in the Lawsonhurst district are a bit hard to come by. It’s one of the areas of the city whose spirits laws fall under the stricter 1913 Annexation Plan and as such, it has a fixed number of permits available at any given time, as opposed to the more relaxed methods of permitting… »

The Silencing of the Ice Cream Trucks

By The City Desk
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The arrival of the first big heat wave of the season also marks the sight of wave after wave of ice cream trucks winding their way through the city’s neighborhoods, delivering cones and bars to its overheated citizens. Of course, this comes with the familiar sound of repetitive tinkling music, which can be heard… »

Friday Facts: Spaghetti, Mad Beats, Otto-Mans

By The City Desk
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:: The Knights of Pythias annual spaghetti dinner in support of Special Olympics has been canceled this year due to a decline in membership from three to one. Group spokesman, 101 year-old Charlie Cassidy, apologized for the cancellation, citing his difficulty distinguishing the numbers on the stove dials, and his inability to lift a… »

Stuff Sullivan’s “Cylinder of Dominance”

By The City Desk
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City Council voted Friday to close a loophole in the City Charter that had allowed for one of the odder legal battles in recent history. By a 5-1 margin, council decided to bring the city’s air-rights definitions into conformance with state and federal standards.
For years, the city’s disinclination to define where a property owner’s… »

Friday Facts: Eggs, Monodirevr, Stripper Parkas

By The City Desk
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:: This Saturday is the 34th annual Last Year’s Easter Egg Hunt at Whittinger’s Park. The Greek Gardening Consortium insists that they hid more than 12 eggs and that if the rest aren’t found there will be no 35th annual Easter Egg Hunt at Whittinger’s Park.
:: Acts of violence committed against actors dressed as “Ronald… »

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